Extremes – Bar Slut or Convent (2)

(delayed posting for Monday)
Some people abstain from not just sex, but also all sexual contact. They may do this for religious reasons. I have no issue with that. Others do so because it seems to them that the only other choice would be to become a slut. This I have an issue with.

If you do nothing, you may as well join a convent. If you enjoy some sexual contact but you don’t “go all the way”, then you’re a tease. If you do “go all the way”, then you’re a slut. Some adults actually believe this and live their lives by this. For gods’ sakes, get out of high school already.

This is a tough one for some people, because the place they live or the places they socialize, that’s the “rule”. That’s how people expect others to behave. If that’s where you socialize, find someplace else, someplace that will respect your choices, that will actually give you the option of giving someone a kiss if you feel like it without the need to drop your pants. If that’s where you live, you may want to consider living somewhere else. If not, then you’re going to have to figure something out. I suggest masturbation or a very discrete friend who also doesn’t care for the “rules” laid down by your society.

For others, this isn’t what their social circle dictates; it’s just the way they live. Some feel like their passion is a burning inferno that if they ever let loose, they will become hedonistic rampages of sexual destruction, or at least have a whole lot more sex than they could respect themselves for. I can understand this, because I know there are people who feel the same way about pain, sadness, and anger. They feel like they have to keep a tight, tight lid on their emotions or else it will overwhelm them and everyone around them. You need a healthy outlet for those emotions, because locked away, they breed and fester. Give them a safe and healthy outlet so that if you come across a situation where that lid gets blown, you won’t be overwhelmed by a hurricane of emotion. I suggest you start by yourself – talking to yourself, reading, writing, punching pillows, or whatever physical outlet is appropriate. Give yourself some time alone, without interruptions, and if you cannot manage that, then there is more wrong with your life than this turmoil inside you.

There are a lot of shades of gray in this continuum where slut and convent are the extremes. You don’t have to life an extreme unless you want to. Just make sure it’s something you choose, not something you just accept as “the way things are”.